HELLO THERE :Dchuxi; nineteen
Yes, welcome to my blog! You don't know what you just landed yourself into! xD But all the same, make yourself at home, get ready your earmuffs,or listen to my crap and grow more white hair
deeper thoughts
4:12 PM
Thursday, December 15, 2011
hmm. i think i've over-estimated myself. well well.
i try to avoid thinking about stuff but sometimes i kind of really feel out of place or inferior. i mean i've heard it a thousand times how each person is unique and there's really something special in everyone and how we shouldn't wish to be someone else for there may be people jealous of who we are, and yet i don't feel quite comfortable in my own skin sometimes. -sigh-
that aside, these few days i'm suddenly staying up almost every night ._. HAHA thanks to 'positive' influence from sqms, especially the no.1 野猫 amelia ng tsktsk almost everynight i'm staying up because of you leh tsktsk.
lol yesterday night was funny, sqms being drunk from hot guys were fun :D haha though i didn't get to go with them T-T (eh pinky you purposely one right! hahaha jkjk! xD) really fun conver which such fun topics lol: plants -> hot dudes -> pelvic line and happy trails -> happy toilet -> urbandictionary's lousy surname definitions haha it was amusing :D OH speaking of which my lousy self-restarting-shy-and-refuse-to-accept-hot-guy-pic-from-sqms phone has yet to show me the photo sqms were awarded HAHA (or pinky demanded xD LOL)
i read meliang's blog abt special fern and normal fern (haha tung! :D nice expression, i like) and i realised that that was exactly my thoughts during my 'stupid' period. haha. Aside from being blur and retarded (like how yall know the story to be), i kind of thought the confessions and 心里话 were from the POV of a true friend. hmm i cant say for sure if our horse should eat the fern but i believe someday things will be figured out :D (BUT FOR NOW i still triumph okay because of my little dimple :D )
oh and haha that day we went back to see CT (in our sleep deprived, and girly nailpolish-covered-fingernails state) haha and i kind of miss CT days hurhur. And some cadets and quite interesting hehee though i think the next time i see them i still wont be able to rmb their names/faces. Hmm i truly feel old. Like when we were interviewing 44/45, it feels so funny because their NCOs are from the sqd i used to be an NCO of ._. haha. I wonder how training for CT with tent will be like haha :D will be quite interested to go back and see more of how these cadets really are :D
all that rubbish aside, after the past few days i've really accumulated some inner thoughts that i REALLY really want to tell someone to the face. T-T It's bugging me like mad but yet i cant bring myself to say it to you, but:
To ___, i have to admit its tiring to try to just listen to you and help you sometimes. i think i can tell from your words and attitude what you truly mean to say, and yet you carry on attempting to mask it to the extent that i feel v tired trying to give you advice while not trying to show that i've alr seen through your intentions. and it actually kind of doesn't help when you tend to harp on it as well. its easier to be frank isn't it, so why can't you just try to be straightforward and let others know what you truly feel. Maybe then, whatever you say wont come off as too annoying alr. (:
and yeap, the last thing i wanted to say!~
YAH YOU TWO BOBOs, TAKE CARE AND I MISS YALL.
and Oh yes, amelia~ when is our next date T-T HAHAHA. :D We need to film our WGM properly :D hahaa
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